Hearing V. Listening – Leadership Check-in
|Do you think you listen when someone speaks or do you think you hear them? Do you think there’s a difference?|
There was a time when my husband would say, “That’s great you let me babble while you multitasked, but did you listen to what I had to say?” Admittedly, I’d heard him, but I hadn’t listened. He’d feel dismissed and unappreciated, would start to act distant so I’d ask if everything was ok, thus triggering a downward communication spiral.
And so it finally hit me. All the doing and pleasing wasn’t creating the kind of connection I craved, nor did it for him. What was hard to admit was that if I was showing up this way at home, it couldn’t have been that much different anywhere else. The way we do one thing is the way we do everything.
I was waiting to talk vs. waiting to listen.
We’ve all experienced the difference too. In the boardroom, at home, with friends. Man, does it feel icky and make you just shut down, want to take your ball, and leave the playground. Buh-byeeee!
Connection is the key ingredient to every business deal, every successful relationship with others, and – ultimately with yourself. If you want to up the connection, practice your active listening.
|Want to get better at listening? Start with being willing to stop doing three things at once and gift yourself the opportunity to show up without distraction for someone. By giving up your need to DO and PLEASE all of the time, you will be able to gift someone the greatest gift ever (that costs zero money): – your engaged presence.Trust me when I say, you will build connections like you’ve never felt before through this way of leadership. Love,|