Month: March 2021

Why Time Management isn’t working: Enter Purpose Management

Today’s leadership prompt: If you had to reduce your to-do list to ONE goal today, could you articulate it?

If I had a dime for everytime someone said to me, “I’m so busy” or “I’m under water,” I’d be a billionaire. 

I get it. Single, married, corporate employee, entrepreneur, Mother, Father, no children…we live in a world that’s addicted to doing, busying, and pleasingBut it’s not a time management issue, it’s a purpose issue. 

If you were about to start a client meeting, I have a hunch you wouldn’t take an impromptu call that would impact your ability to be on time to the meeting? 

If you had a new baby that had to be fed every three hours, you wouldn’t take an extra hour responding to emails, leaving the baby malnourished.

In both cases, you’d be clear on your purpose.

More often than not, our busyness is a direct result of 

*check mark* not having clear goals and 

*check mark* not aligning our actions with those goals. 

We fill our time with lots of tasks that we do out of pleasing and our need for validation. We forget about our boundaries and behave as though ‘everything is urgent’

So I ask you to consider — in your leadership today, are you managing your time, or are you managing your purpose?

If you had to reduce your to-do list to ONE goal today, could you articulate it?

Ego V. Authentic Self – Spot the Difference

TRUTH TIME. There were many years in my marriage, in the boardroom, and — I’m embarrassed to admit this — but also with my children…where I kept my mouth shut. 
 John, my husband, would share the plans for the weekend and, while I love ‘us’ time, I’d be craving ‘me’ time. Out of fear of sounding selfish and assuming that my speaking up would cause a rift, I’d just keep my mouth shut. In my early days at Amazon, sitting in a meeting being one of only two females and not agreeing with the sales strategy we were creating, out of fear of appearing or sounding stupid, I would bite my tongue, mumble under my breath, and go along with it. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been exhausted from parenting three boys and working full time, but more comfortable complaining than asking for help because there was no way I wanted to appear like I couldn’t do it. 
The Upside? I stayed comfortable. I didn’t have to deal with possible rejection, arguing, or looking foolish.The Downside? My stuffing, ignoring, and silencing created resentment. Before I knew it, I would often feel disconnected, bored, and uninspired. Zero growth happens inside of our comfort zone.

My ego had massive power over my thoughts and actions, and it was literally killing my soul. 

Ego sounds like…
Your Ego is constantly shouting in the hopes of keeping you safe and on the straight and narrow, where failure is less likely to occur. Whereas your Authentic Self is that voice that wants you to experience your fully-expressed existence, no matter what. It’s often a faint whisper, but it’s there.  Authentic Self sounds like…
THREE ACTIONS YOU CAN TAKE TODAY TO FEEL MORE CONNECTED, INSPIRED, FULFILLED + MORE DIRECT. Slow down and pay attention to the whisper. That’s your Authentic Self talking. Do the thing that scares you. The thing that you’ve been putting off out of fear. By standing in bravery, you will experience your Authentic Self. Ask for support. I’m here, and I bet you have someone close to you that’s invested in you.The happy you’re looking for will come from your Authentic Self, not your ego; and you’ll feel a lot more confident by being brave enough to speak up!  I believe in you,

Hearing V. Listening – Leadership Check-in

Do you think you listen when someone speaks or do you think you hear them? Do you think there’s a difference?

There was a time when my husband would say, “That’s great you let me babble while you multitasked, but did you listen to what I had to say?” Admittedly, I’d heard him, but I hadn’t listened. He’d feel dismissed and unappreciated, would start to act distant so I’d ask if everything was ok, thus triggering a downward communication spiral. 
And so it finally hit me. All the doing and pleasing wasn’t creating the kind of connection I craved, nor did it for him. What was hard to admit was that if I was showing up this way at home, it couldn’t have been that much different anywhere else. The way we do one thing is the way we do everything

I was waiting to talk vs. waiting to listen. 

We’ve all experienced the difference too. In the boardroom, at home, with friends.  Man, does it feel icky and make you just shut down, want to take your ball, and leave the playground. Buh-byeeee!

Connection is the key ingredient to every business deal, every successful relationship with others, and – ultimately with yourself. If you want to up the connection, practice your active listening.
Want to get better at listening? Start with being willing to stop doing three things at once and gift yourself the opportunity to show up without distraction for someone. By giving up your need to DO and PLEASE all of the time, you will be able to gift someone the greatest gift ever (that costs zero money): – your engaged presence.Trust me when I say, you will build connections like you’ve never felt before through this way of leadership. Love,

Experience V Result – Where Are You Leading From?

I once coached a highly driven executive who hired me because he wanted to:

  • Increase his fulfilment as a Creative Director by working ONLY with socially conscious brands
  • Increase his revenue by 20%
  • Increase his connection + intimacy with his wife

He was committed. He was about learning and growing and wasn’t afraid to do the work. He created his first breakthrough around speaking up. He went from being someone who would withdrawal when the flame got turned up, to someone vulnerable enough to say the things he was never willing to say in service to growth. And so:

✔️ The impact on his marriage was almost immediate. He was worried that speaking his truth would drive them apart, yet it actually brought them much closer. She felt seen and understood. Hubba hubba.

✔️ He learned how to say no to brands that didn’t align with his values.

✔️ He grew his revenue by 8%. 


❌  He was so fixated on growing his revenue, in his mind he didn’t succeed.

He couldn’t see all the other wins he created.  He intellectually said he was committed to the journey, but that wasn’t how he evaluated his success. 

So I ask you to consider — in your leadership today, are you valuing the journey?

If you committed to the experience versus the end result, what would you need to let go of?