Month: June 2020

I can’t sleep, my heart has something to say to you.

We’re leaving on a 13-hour road trip today, and I just couldn’t sleep. Rather then tossing and turning I decided to write to our SG Tribe. This is a longer share, but there’s no quieting my heart, so I appreciate you being here, reading and engaging my thoughts (pls excuse typos). I have an invitation for you in this note, so pls stay with me! Also, it’s no accident that it’s Juneteenth today. In case you don’t know, Juneteenth is the oldest nationally celebrated commemoration of the ending of slavery in the United States. Yet, as we’ve seen, it didn’t put racism to death.

That’s where you and I enter the picture.

Connection is my #1 value and I believe at the end of the day, it’s the quality, the value, the feeling that every single one of us is craving the most with ourselves and with each other. It’s like oxygen. Without, we can’t breathe and we most certainly can’t co-exist side-by-side in a world that fosters justice and peace for BIPOC.

I believe connection necessary ingredient required MLK’s dream to become true, “One day we will live in a nation where we (they) will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.” MLK

Just over a week ago I was sitting with one of my best friends, Tashion Macon, Godmother to our youngest son, having one of our heart to heart convos as we always do. We started off having a good laugh over recent Netflix shows we’ve watched, to sharing the latest on our relationships and work wins and challenges. Without missing a beat, we moved into sharing what was really on our mind regarding the ever-present racism towards Black, BIPOC in our country. As Tashion was sharing, and I was struck by how comfortable, connected and safe we both felt in baring our soul, asking each other poignant questions, and not thinking twice about ‘getting it wrong.’

This may surprise you, but we’ve been asked many times how we became such good friends. People have noticed there’s sisterly love, and acceptance, a love, respect amongst is unshakeable.

It’s an interesting question when you think about it, and one that’s stopped me in my tracks and left me baffled as well as her. It pains me to say this, but I have a hunch we get asked it because she’s black and I’m white.

See our friendship grew out of a connection of spirituality. At the time, I was completing an advanced degree in Spirituality and Tashion had already completed her advanced studies in Spiritual Psychology. That connection point was the ripple that enhanced, evolved, and expanded our relationship and ultimately formed a friendship with no edges.

It’s this kind of connection that starts from a place of seeing the good in someone, extending grace when you notice your friend fumbling to learn and grow and no-matter-what champion them to be the best version of themselves.

Tashion and I both agreed quite quickly that there is a massive group of people in our world black and white, who have felt much of the below:

Hungry to have a soul-to-soul connection with people of different color.

Desire to impact humanity that fosters equality for BIPOC and change the trajectory for generations to come.

Are White and are afraid to speak up, even though they know intellectually they have to be willing to sit in the discomfort of saying the wrong thing in service to their growth around becoming anti-racist.

Are BIPOC and have felt a range of anger, disappointment, frustration, and betrayal with the lack of white people trying to understand and connect with them in a way that fosters really feeling seen, understood, and supported. As a result, hold back sharing their truest feelings for fear they will be even more judged and belittled.

Can you relate?

Tashion and I have observed the main approach being highlighted in social media distinguishing anti-racism, stems from a place of looking at how we’re different, vs. how we’re similar. It’s a nuance, but it’s actually really important. The strategy that’s being encouraged is to read everything you possibly can on anti-racism while also listening to as many podcasts as possible on the subject. Listen and learn. I’m all for expanding our minds and this kind of learning is valuable, however, more information doesn’t magically create transformation. Especially if digested alone. If it were that easy, we probably wouldn’t be having this conversation in 2020.

We believe change happens at the heart of CONNECTION and requires INTENTIONAL ACTION that is authentic to you. It’s from this place, we’re able to build a bridge between one another and hold each other’s hearts with a preciousness and speak to our differences, with the intention that BIPOC absolutely are equal and should be treated that way.

Tashion and I have partnered before and have always known we’ve had a calling to serve together and create impact, and the time is now.

We’re on a BIG intentional mission and are creating a movement & a curated community called ‘In The Ripple’ that places connection at the heart of change, first focusing on black equality and then rippling out to ALL of humanity.

It is from this foundation that we facilitate conversations, rooted in connection and commonality, for a more hopeful and just future for all.

Mark your calendars on 6.27.20 8am PT- to 9:30PT for our 1st ‘Connected Conversation.’

The heart of honest conversation and humanity meets here, rippling inwards, outward, forward, and onward.

Together, we have a toolkit of connection and conversation strategies that will positively enhance persons committed to being the change they wish to see in the world and the change humanity so desperately is crying out for in these unprecedented times. This conversation is for black women, men, and white women, men to come together in a space with no edges.

We’re not claiming to be experts in anti-racism, but we are owning our superpowers as masterful co-facilitators around conversations that inspire action and are rooted in connection.

All we’re asking is that you make a donation to Color of Change, an organization we wholeheartedly believe in. Share with us that you’ve donated, and we’ll get you squared away with all the necessary details for our Connected Convo as well as admit you into our private @intheripple FB Group.

We’re limiting the size of this group because we’re very particular about how we facilitate and ensure that this is absolutely a safe space for voices to be heard, expressed and connection to be fostered in a way that creates sustainable change at the soul level. Spots are limited, so if this speaks to you, pls email me at my personal email by Wed. June 24th, and I will personally respond to you. Join In the Ripple, ‘Connected Conversation’ Virtual Summit on 6.27.20.

Onward together,

Own Your Impact: The World Needs You Now

Do you get just how powerful you are? The reason I ask is I noticed a clear theme this week with a segment of my clients: women in powerful leadership roles with track records of traditional success, unknowingly giving their power away. I’m calling attention to it because I don’t think it’s relevant to just my clients, but instead to driven women in general. Seeing this makes me so sad because giving away power softens the full impact of the fabulousness that can be shared with the world!

So many driven female leaders seemed exhausted and frustrated this week. Certainly doesn’t help with all that is going on at large, but, if I’m really honest, I’ve seen this pattern of behavior by women even pre-COVID, before mass protests, and prior to the economic bust.

This pattern often gets disguised in various versions of people pleasing. The flavor I notice the most is around female Sr. Execs involving way to many people in their big decisions because they want their teams to know that their opinions matter; that they matter. However, these leaders tend to swing so far over, creating indecision on their part and frustration on the part of the team due to lack of clarity.

Been there before?

Look, being in leadership and managing can be very lonely. It’s impossible to please everyone. We know that intellectually, yet I see so many women still trying to check that approval box with every decision they make. It doesn’t work! The real bummer of it all is that these leaders end up diminishing their own power, and ultimately their impact.

Eventually, I find two things happen: Either burn out, blaming the job, which leads to finding a new gig. Or, getting so fed up with it that leaders finally crack, realizing their leadership needs an upgrade.

It’s simple. Not easy, but simple.

Here’s the question I ask myself and my clients regularly that very quickly snaps me back into leadership.

What are you tolerating right now that  if you were to stop tolerating, you could be 10x more impactful?

I decided a while ago that I was done tolerating the crazy idea that other people’s opinions mattered more than mine. I hated the way it made me feel, and the time I wasted in the process of asking what others thought. Since I committed to no longer tolerating that behavior, I’ve felt such a sense of self-trust and so much more empowered and confident.

My SG tribe women: it’s time to own your magnificence and be willing to own your power. The world needs your gifts. We need your gifts; you need your gifts.

Shoot me a note or share with us on social, what you’re done tolerating. We got you. The tribe has you and, by no means, do you need to uplevel your leadership on your own.

Here’s to living your legacy and owning it,

A Personal Note From Sarah

How is your Heart today? 

Given the fear and loss created by Covid-19 to the horrific murder of George Floyd to the ongoing racism that exists in everyday moments, I’m disgusted, saddened, and stunned. I’m also intimidated.  

In full transparency, I’ve written and rewritten this email several times this week, only to come back to it after feeling like it was missing the mark. 

As a white woman, conscious of my many privileges, I have work to do. Now more than ever, I believe my mission through SG&Co remains incredibly important: to support ALL people living their legacy. 

We’ve all been introduced to meaningful opportunities to take immediate action – everything from donating money to the George Floyd Fund to lifting up the voices of and work done by all the strong, thoughtful Black leaders guiding our pained communities. 

I felt myself swept up this week with all the immediate ways to take action and make a difference. My communities shared all of the media recommendations with the goal of reinforcing anti-racism. However, the efforts just felt like they fell short given the enormous weight of what’s happening. Even my body was telling me this through the jittery anxiousness and tension I was feeling mid-week.

As doers who instinctively take action, want to be in the trenches, and yearn to make an impact, we immediately activate through our outward-facing behaviors. However, we have to be careful to not rest too comfortably, mistaking clever social posts, donations, and diving deeply into books as the only means towards transformation. While those actions are important, information does not equal transformation. I believe transformation in our consciousness is what will lay the foundation for systemic change.

There’s an essential step we all need to take to ensure we don’t trip on our road to the future. This is what I am doing:

I’ve committed to slowing down this week. Before sharing resources, curating social media, I’m taking stock of my own thoughts, assumptions, and behaviors that do not directly acknowledge the experience of people of color.

I’m also having intentional, one-on-one conversations with family, friends, and clients who are part of the black community through either the color of their skin or as part of a mixed-racial household. 

Listening. Learning. 

I see this as an opportunity for all us.

I’d love for you to join me.  If you’re wanting to evolve at your core (another word here) it starts  inside as an honest conversation with yourself without all the distractions. As well as inside one-on-one conversations with members of the Black community. This will begin to transform your way of being and intentional action, and will create systemic change. 

We’ll be sharing more about the action we’re taking over the coming weeks, but we’re not in a hurry. We’re all in on Black Lives Matter, and we’re all in standing in leadership to live a legacy we’re all proud of every single day all allows us to put our heads on the pillow at night and know we’re living from integrity.

Much love,

Sarah & the SG&Co team